Bird's-eye view
This proverb sets before us a stark and simple contrast between two kinds of men, identified by how they handle sensitive information. On the one hand, you have the slanderer, the talebearer, the gossip. His defining characteristic is that he cannot keep a secret. Information comes into his possession, and it must go out. He is a leaky vessel. On the other hand, you have the man who is faithful in spirit. His defining trait is that he is a vault. He is trustworthy, and he demonstrates this trustworthiness by knowing when to keep his mouth shut. This is a matter of basic character, and it reveals the condition of a man's soul. Is he governed by a desire to stir up strife for his own amusement or sense of importance, or is he governed by a steadfast loyalty to God and his neighbor?
The central issue here is faithfulness. The world runs on information, and so does the church. How we handle what we know about others is a primary test of our spiritual maturity. The slanderer traffics in secrets for personal gain, even if that gain is just the fleeting thrill of being in the know. The faithful man understands that some matters are to be concealed, covered over by love, and protected from the ravenous ears of the idle and the malicious. This proverb is a call to cultivate a spirit of faithfulness, which is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, and to reject the loose-lipped foolishness that tears communities apart.
Outline
- 1. The Character of the Slanderer (v. 13a)
- a. His Defining Action: Going About
- b. His Defining Sin: Revealing Secrets
- 2. The Character of the Faithful Man (v. 13b)
- a. His Defining Quality: Faithful in Spirit
- b. His Defining Practice: Concealing a Matter
Context In Proverbs
Proverbs is wisdom literature. This means it gives us skill for living, not a set of flat, mathematical axioms that apply in every situation without thought. You cannot read Proverbs like you read Euclid. This is why one proverb will tell you to answer a fool according to his folly (Prov. 26:5), and the one right before it tells you not to (Prov. 26:4). Wisdom is knowing which proverb applies to which fool at which time.
So it is here. This proverb tells us that a faithful man conceals a matter. But other Scriptures tell us there are times when sin must be exposed. Paul rebuked Peter publicly (Gal. 2:14). Unrepentant sin is to be told to the whole church (Matt. 18:17). The key is the "spirit" of the man. Is he motivated by faithfulness, love, and a desire for righteousness? Or is he a talebearer, motivated by malice, envy, or a love for turmoil? The broader context of Proverbs consistently builds a composite picture of the righteous man as one whose speech builds up, and the fool as one whose speech destroys. This verse is a key brushstroke in that portrait.
Verse by Verse Commentary
Proverbs 11:13
"He who goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets, But he who is faithful in spirit conceals a matter."
He who goes about as a slanderer...
The Hebrew word for slanderer here is related to the idea of a peddler or a merchant. This is a man who traffics in information. He "goes about." He is a busybody. He makes it his business to collect and distribute stories about other people. This is not an accidental slip of the tongue we are talking about. This is a chosen vocation. He is a retailer of ruin. He listens at keyholes, he encourages whispers, and he always has some juicy tidbit to offer in order to get one in return. He is the social arsonist, and his currency is the reputation of others. He is not a truth-teller or a whistleblower, though he will often style himself as one. He is a slanderer, a man whose words are filled with the venom of asps.
...reveals secrets,
This is his trade. He takes what was private and makes it public. He uncovers what was meant to be covered. A secret is entrusted to him, and he treats that trust as an opportunity. He sees a confidence as a commodity to be sold for a moment of attention or a feeling of power. He does not understand loyalty. The very concept of a privileged conversation is foreign to him. Because his own soul is a public thoroughfare with no locked doors, he assumes everyone else's life should be as well. This man is dangerous. He is a walking security breach in any family, church, or community. To tell him a secret is to publish it in the town square.
But he who is faithful in spirit...
Here is the contrast, and it is a contrast of the inner man. The issue is not ultimately about a set of external rules for speech, but about the kind of "spirit" a man has. Is he faithful? The Hebrew word for faithful here is where we get our word "Amen." It means he is solid, reliable, trustworthy, and true. His character is integrated. His words and his heart are aligned with God's reality. This faithfulness is not a natural human attribute; it is a fruit of the Holy Spirit (Gal. 5:22). It is a reflection of the character of God Himself, who is utterly faithful to His promises. A man who is faithful in spirit is a man whose spirit is being sanctified by the Spirit of God.
...conceals a matter.
What does this faithful man do? He conceals a matter. He covers it. This is the practical outworking of his faithful spirit. When he learns of a brother's fault, a neighbor's struggle, or a delicate situation, his first instinct is not to broadcast it, but to protect it. This is what love does. "Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all sins" (Prov. 10:12). This man understands that redemption is the great theme of the gospel. God in Christ did not come to expose and shame us, but to cover our sin with His blood. The faithful man participates in this gospel logic. He knows that loose talk can destroy a reputation that took years to build. He knows that some matters are best handled quietly, between two people, or within the proper channels of authority. He is not engaged in a sinful cover-up of unrepentant wickedness; he is practicing the righteousness of love, which "does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth." And the truth is that we are all sinners in need of grace, and a key instrument of that grace is the faithful brother who knows when to keep his mouth shut.
Application
The application of this proverb is intensely practical and cuts right to the heart of our daily conduct as Christians. We live in an age of gossip on steroids. Social media has turned millions of people into professional talebearers, revealing secrets, half-truths, and outright lies with the click of a button. We must resolve to be the people of the second half of this verse.
First, examine your own heart and your own speech. Are you a leaky vessel or a vault? When you hear a piece of negative information about someone, is your first impulse to tell someone else? Do you find a certain thrill in being the first to break a story? If so, you need to repent. You are walking in the way of the slanderer, not the faithful. Ask God to give you a faithful spirit, one that treasures loyalty and loves your neighbor enough to protect their reputation.
Second, be wise about who you confide in. Do not entrust your secrets to a known gossip. Look for those who have demonstrated a faithful spirit over time. A man who will gossip to you will gossip about you. Surround yourself with men and women who know how to conceal a matter.
Finally, remember the gospel. Our God is a God who conceals. He has removed our transgressions from us as far as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12). He has cast our sins into the depths of the sea (Micah 7:19). He has covered them with the blood of His Son. Because He has been faithful to us in this ultimate way, let us be faithful to one another in our speech. Let our words be instruments of grace, peace, and upbuilding, not tools of the accuser of the brethren.