Bird's-eye view
This proverb, like so many in this book, is a bracing dose of realism about the way our fallen world operates. It is a shrewd observation about human nature, noting the gravitational pull that wealth and power exert on the hearts of men. Solomon is not being cynical here; he is being a clear-eyed realist. He is describing what is, not necessarily what ought to be. The verse functions as a mirror, showing us the unvarnished truth about our own motivations and the motivations of those around us. It reveals a world where favor is sought and friendships are bought. For the believer, this is not a cause for despair, but rather a call to wisdom. It forces us to examine the foundation of our own relationships and to distinguish the fleeting loyalty of beneficiaries from the covenantal faithfulness that is grounded in God alone. Ultimately, it points us to the one true Nobleman and Giver of Gifts, Jesus Christ, whose favor is not for sale and whose friendship is not contingent on what we can offer Him.
The structure is a classic Hebrew parallelism, where the second line echoes and intensifies the first. The "noble man" (or generous man) in the first clause is paralleled by the "man who gives gifts" in the second. The action of "seeking favor" is paralleled by being his "friend." It is a simple, profound, and universally recognizable truth about the social dynamics of a world east of Eden.
Outline
- 1. The Magnetic Power of Generosity (Prov 19:6)
- a. The Court of the Noble Man (Prov 19:6a)
- b. The Price of Friendship (Prov 19:6b)
Context In Proverbs
Proverbs 19 is a collection of sayings that contrast the righteous with the wicked, the wise with the fool, and the rich with the poor. This particular verse fits squarely within a recurring theme in Proverbs: the social power of wealth and the precarious position of the poor. Just a few verses earlier, we read, "Wealth adds many friends, but a poor man is separated from his friend" (Prov 19:4). And the very next verse says, "All the brothers of a poor man hate him; how much more do his friends go far from him!" (Prov 19:7). So, our verse is part of a cluster of observations about how money, or the lack of it, shapes human relationships. The book of Proverbs does not condemn wealth, but it consistently warns against trusting in it and exposes the shallow nature of the "friendships" that wealth can buy. This realism is meant to drive the reader to seek a more durable foundation for life and relationships, which is the fear of the Lord.
Key Issues
- The Nature of Fallen Human Motivation
- The Difference Between Flattery and True Friendship
- The Proper Use of Wealth and Generosity
- The Danger of Mercenary Relationships
- The Contrast with God's Unconditional Favor
Fair-Weather Friends
The world runs on grease. The wheels of commerce, politics, and social climbing are all lubricated by favor and gifts. Solomon is simply pulling back the curtain to show us the machinery. This is not cynicism; it is sociology. People are naturally drawn to those who can benefit them. The rich man's house is always full. The powerful man never lacks for dinner invitations. This is a fundamental observation about our creaturely self-interest.
But for the Christian, this observation should do more than just make us savvy about the world. It should make us hungry for a different kind of economy, a different kind of friendship. The gospel introduces us to a world where the King of kings seeks the favor of paupers, where the ultimate Giver of Gifts befriends those who have nothing to offer in return. This proverb describes the world system perfectly, a system that the gospel comes to subvert and ultimately replace with a kingdom of grace, where relationships are not transactions but covenantal bonds sealed in the blood of Christ.
Verse by Verse Commentary
6 Many will seek the favor of a noble man,
The word for "noble man" here is nadib. It carries the idea of a prince, a ruler, or someone who is generous and magnanimous. This is the kind of person who has resources and influence. And what happens when someone has resources and influence? A line forms at his door. "Many" will entreat his favor. They will seek his face, as the Hebrew says. This is the world of patronage. People are drawn to power and wealth like moths to a flame. They want to be seen with him, to be in his good graces, because they know that his favor can translate into tangible benefits for them. This is not necessarily wicked in and of itself; it is simply the way of the world. A ruler's favor can mean justice (Prov 29:26), and a generous man's help can mean survival. But the proverb's realism lies in the word "many." The crowd is fickle, and its allegiance follows the money.
And everyone is a friend to a man who gives gifts.
The second clause sharpens the point and brings it down to a more personal level. It moves from the court of the nobleman to the personal relationships of the gift-giver. And the word is even more emphatic: "everyone." It is a hyperbole, of course, but a telling one. A man who is known for his generosity will not lack for companions. His gifts act as a social magnet. The problem is that the friendship is tied directly to the gifts. As another proverb says, "A man's gift makes room for him and brings him before the great" (Prov 18:16). Gifts open doors and create the appearance of friendship. But what kind of friendship is it? It is a friendship of convenience, a mercenary relationship. The "friend" is a friend of the man's wallet, not his soul. When the gifts dry up, these friends, like the prodigal son's companions, will vanish (Luke 15:13-15). This is a sober warning to both the giver and the receiver. The giver must not mistake beneficiaries for brothers, and the receiver must examine his heart to see if his affection is genuine or simply a response to the material blessing.
Application
There are several sharp points of application for us here. First, we must be ruthlessly honest about our own hearts. Why are we drawn to certain people? Is it because of their character, their love for Christ, their wisdom? Or is it because they are influential, successful, and generous, and we hope some of it will rub off on us? This proverb is a call to self-examination. Are our friendships grounded in covenant love or in a subtle form of spiritual consumerism?
Second, for those whom God has blessed with resources, this is a call to wisdom. It is good and right to be generous. The "noble man" who gives gifts is a blessing. But he must not be naive. He must not equate the crowd that gathers around him with a band of loyal brothers. He must use his wealth to build true community, not to purchase flattery. And he must learn to discern between the man who loves him and the man who loves his handouts.
Finally, and most importantly, this proverb should drive us to marvel at the gospel. God is the ultimate Nobleman, the Giver of every good and perfect gift. And yet, He does not wait for us to seek His favor. While we were still sinners, His enemies, He sought us out. He gave the ultimate gift, His own Son, to purchase friendship with rebels who had nothing to offer Him but our sin. His friendship is not for sale. His favor is not earned. It is all of grace. When we grasp this, we are liberated from the world's economy of favor-seeking and gift-buying. We can build genuine, Christ-centered friendships that are not dependent on what we can get, because in Christ, we have already been given everything.