Commentary - 1 Samuel 18:17-19

Bird's-eye view

In this brief but potent scene, we see the political machinations of a king unraveling. Saul, having already seen the Lord's favor depart from him and rest mightily upon David, now resorts to a kind of sanctimonious treachery. His jealousy, which had already manifested in spear-throwing, now puts on a pious mask. He offers his daughter to David, not as a genuine reward or blessing, but as bait for a trap. The offer is couched in the language of honor and duty, yet its true intent is murder by proxy. David's response, in stark contrast, is one of profound humility, revealing a man who understands his station before God and king, and who is not grasping for power or prestige. The section concludes with Saul's casual treachery fully revealed as he breaks his promise, further demonstrating his unfitness to be king over God's people.

This passage is a masterful study in contrasts: the king's duplicity against David's integrity, Saul's manipulative use of his children against David's humble view of his own family, and the outward show of royal favor against the inward reality of murderous intent. It is a pivotal moment that further solidifies David's righteousness and Saul's decay, setting the stage for the long conflict that is to come between the house of Saul and the house of David.

Outline

Context In 1 Samuel

This passage does not occur in a vacuum. We are fresh off David's stunning victory over Goliath and his subsequent military successes, which have earned him the adoration of the people, particularly the women of Israel (1 Sam. 18:7). This popularity is the very thing that has ignited Saul's paranoid jealousy. The Spirit of the Lord has departed from Saul and an evil spirit is tormenting him, while David is clearly walking in God's favor and wisdom (1 Sam. 18:12-14). Saul is afraid of David. This fear is the engine driving the events here. Saul has already tried to kill David with his own hand (1 Sam. 18:11). That having failed, he now moves to a more subtle and cowardly method. He wants David dead, but he wants the Philistines to do the dirty work, thus keeping his own hands technically clean.

Verse by Verse Commentary

1 Samuel 18:17

Then Saul said to David, "Here is my older daughter Merab; I will give her to you as a wife; only be a man of valor for me and fight Yahweh's battles." For Saul thought, "My hand shall not be against him, but let the hand of the Philistines be against him."

Saul initiates this exchange, and he does so with a proposition that, on the surface, appears to be an extraordinary honor. To be the king's son-in-law was to be brought into the very center of power and prestige. The offer of Merab, the elder daughter, was the fulfillment of the promise made to whoever defeated Goliath (1 Sam. 17:25), though Saul is conveniently late in making good on it. The offer is not unconditional, however. It comes with a charge: "only be a man of valor for me and fight Yahweh's battles."

This is where the piety is ladled on thick. Saul frames his requirement in the most spiritual terms possible. He is not asking David to fight "Saul's battles," but "Yahweh's battles." This is a classic move of a manipulator. He is co-opting God's name for his own nefarious purposes. He is trying to make his death-trap for David sound like a holy crusade. He wants to send David into the teeth of the Philistine army, hoping they will solve his David problem for him. The narrator, inspired by the Holy Spirit, does not leave us guessing as to the motive. We are told Saul's inward thought directly: "My hand shall not be against him, but let the hand of the Philistines be against him." Saul is a coward. He wants David dead but lacks the political capital or the courage to do it openly. He wants to maintain plausible deniability. This is the very picture of a man ruled by sin; his public words are holy, but his private thoughts are murderous.

1 Samuel 18:18

But David said to Saul, "Who am I, and what is my life or my father's family in Israel, that I should be the king's son-in-law?"

David's response is a marvel of humility, and it is entirely genuine. He does not see this as an opportunity for social climbing. He does not presume upon the honor. Instead, he sees the immense gulf between his station and the one being offered. His question, "Who am I?" is not false modesty. It is the honest assessment of a man who knows he is a subject, a servant of the king. He is the youngest son of a Bethlehemite, a shepherd boy who has been providentially elevated. But he has not let that elevation go to his head.

He goes on to diminish not just himself, but his entire family: "what is my life or my father's family in Israel...?" In the ancient world, family and lineage were everything. David is essentially saying that his clan is of no great account in Israel. They are not a noble house. This response reveals a heart that is not grasping or ambitious. Unlike Saul, who seized the kingdom and now clings to it with a murderous grip, David is content to serve. This humility is one of the key reasons God's favor rests upon him. He is not trying to make a name for himself; he is simply trying to be faithful in the place God has put him. This is a profound contrast to the pride that has brought Saul so low.

1 Samuel 18:19

So it happened at the time when Merab, Saul's daughter, should have been given to David, that she was given to Adriel the Meholathite as a wife.

Here the narrator delivers the denouement of Saul's little scheme with a blunt and telling finality. The appointed time for the wedding comes, the time when the promise "should have been" fulfilled. But Saul, being a man without integrity, breaks his word without a second thought. He gives Merab to another man, Adriel the Meholathite. We are not told why Adriel was more suitable, and it does not matter. The point is the insult and the breach of contract.

This action reveals several things about Saul. First, it shows his utter contempt for David. He dangles this great honor in front of him only to snatch it away, a public humiliation. Second, it shows his disregard for his own word. A king's word should be his bond, but Saul's promises are worthless, mere tools of manipulation. Third, it shows his treatment of his own daughter as a political pawn. Merab is not a person to him, but a piece on a game board. This casual treachery is the fruit of a heart that has abandoned the fear of God. When a man is no longer constrained by his duty to God, he will not be constrained by his duty to his fellow man, not even to his own family or his most valiant warrior.

Application

We must first see the stark difference between the man of God and the man of the flesh. David, though he is a warrior, is marked by humility and a trust in God's providence. He is not striving for position. Saul, though he is the king, is marked by a striving, paranoid jealousy. He uses God-talk to cover his murderous plots. We must ask ourselves which man we resemble. Do we use spiritual language to get what we want, or do we, like David, genuinely see ourselves as unworthy servants of a great King?

Second, we must recognize the deadliness of envy. Saul's envy did not just make him unhappy; it turned him into a liar and a plotter of murder. Envy is never a static sin. It grows, and it seeks to destroy the object of its hatred. When we see the gifts and blessings God has given to another, our response must be thanksgiving, not the bitter resentment that consumed Saul.

Lastly, we see the importance of integrity. Saul's word meant nothing, and this was a symptom of his deeper spiritual disease. As Christians, our word should be our bond. Our "yes" should be "yes." When we make promises, we are to keep them, because we serve a God who is a covenant-keeping God. Saul's casual breaking of his promise was an indicator of his broken relationship with Yahweh, the God of promises. Our faithfulness in small things, in the keeping of our word, is a reflection of our relationship with the One who is Truth itself.