The Theology of the Getaway Car: Text: Judges 18:11-26
Introduction: When Pragmatism Becomes God
The book of Judges is a chronicle of a nation spiraling downward. It is a relentless cycle of sin, oppression, crying out to God, and deliverance, followed by an even more corrupt return to sin. The refrain that brackets this final, ugly section of the book is "In those days there was no king in Israel; everyone did what was right in his own eyes." We must be clear. This is not a libertarian paradise. This is not a celebration of rugged individualism. This is a diagnosis of anarchy, a portrait of a people whose only authority is their own appetite. When every man is his own king, it means every man is his own god, and the result is not freedom, but a brutal, chaotic landscape where the strong devour the weak.
In the previous chapter, we were introduced to the clownish idolatry of a man named Micah. He stole money from his mother, she cursed the thief, he confessed, and she dedicated the silver to Yahweh by having it made into a graven image. This is syncretism of the highest order, attempting to worship the true God with the very methods He explicitly forbids. Micah then compounds his folly by setting up a personal shrine and consecrating one of his own sons as a priest. When a wandering Levite comes along, Micah hires him, thinking this will add a veneer of legitimacy to his homemade religion. "Now I know," he says, "that the Lord will be good to me, since I have a Levite as priest." He has it all backward. He thinks having the right religious professional on the payroll obligates God to bless his idolatry.
This is the backdrop for our text today. We are about to see this corrupt, man-centered religion get an upgrade. It is going to move from a household affair to a tribal one. A band of Danites, unable to secure their allotted inheritance, have decided to go find land for themselves. They are operating on pure pragmatism. They are not asking what God has commanded, but what works. And what works, in a world without a king, is armed robbery. We are about to witness the collision of a corrupt priest, a band of opportunistic marauders, and a weak-willed idolater. This is not just a historical account of a bizarre robbery; it is a stark warning about what happens when theology is determined by what feels good, what seems practical, and what you can get away with.
The Text
Then from the family of the Danites, from Zorah and from Eshtaol, 600 men armed with weapons of war set out. And they went up and camped at Kiriath-jearim in Judah. Therefore they called that place Mahaneh-dan to this day; behold, it is west of Kiriath-jearim. Then they passed from there to the hill country of Ephraim and came to the house of Micah. And the five men who went to spy out the country of Laish answered and said to their relatives, “Do you know that there are in these houses an ephod and household idols and a graven image and a molten image? So now, know what you should do.” Then they turned aside there and came to the house of the young man, the Levite, to the house of Micah, and asked him of his welfare. Now the 600 men armed with their weapons of war, who were of the sons of Dan, were standing by the entrance of the gate. Then the five men who went to spy out the land went up and entered there, and took the graven image and the ephod and household idols and the molten image. And the priest was standing by the entrance of the gate with the 600 men armed with weapons of war. Now these had entered into Micah’s house and took the graven image, the ephod and household idols and the molten image. Then the priest said to them, “What are you doing?” And they said to him, “Be silent; put your hand over your mouth and come with us and be to us a father and a priest. Is it better for you to be a priest to the house of one man or to be priest to a tribe and a family in Israel?” And the priest’s heart was merry, and he took the ephod and household idols and the graven image and entered among the people. Then they turned and went away and put the little ones and the livestock and the valuables in front of them. They had gone some distance from the house of Micah, and the men who were in the houses near Micah’s house were summoned and then overtook the sons of Dan. And they called out to the sons of Dan, who turned around and said to Micah, “What is the matter with you, that you were summoned together?” And he said, “You have taken away my gods which I made, and the priest, and have gone away, and what do I have besides? So how can you say to me, ‘What is the matter with you?’ ” Then the sons of Dan said to him, “Do not let your voice be heard among us, lest men, bitter of soul, fall upon you and you lose your life, with the lives of your household.” So the sons of Dan went on their way; and when Micah saw that they were too strong for him, he turned and went back to his house.
(Judges 18:11-26 LSB)
An Upgrade in Idolatry (vv. 11-17)
We begin with the Danites on the move.
"Then from the family of the Danites, from Zorah and from Eshtaol, 600 men armed with weapons of war set out... and came to the house of Micah." (Judges 18:11, 13)
Here we have a private army, a militia of 600 men, looking for a place to live. They are from the tribe of Dan, the tribe that had failed to drive out the inhabitants of their inheritance as God had commanded. So now they are freelancing. They come to Micah's house, and the five spies who had been there before report what they found. Notice their counsel: "Do you know that there are in these houses an ephod and household idols and a graven image and a molten image? So now, know what you should do" (v. 14). This is the language of pure pragmatism. They don't say, "This is an abomination to the Lord, let's destroy it." They say, "There are religious artifacts here, you know what to do." Their thought is entirely utilitarian. These things brought Micah good luck, according to their superstitious worldview, so they will bring us good luck. We need a god to go before us, and this one is conveniently available.
So while the 600 armed men wait at the gate, a show of force, the five spies go in and steal the idols. This is a theft, plain and simple. They are violating the eighth commandment, "You shall not steal," in order to more effectively violate the second commandment, "You shall not make for yourself a carved image." This is how sin works; it compounds. You cannot break one of God's laws without trampling on others. Their idolatry requires theft, and as we will see, their theft will require threats of violence.
A Hireling with a Career Ladder (vv. 18-20)
The priest, this young Levite named Jonathan, sees the theft in progress and raises a feeble objection.
"Then the priest said to them, 'What are you doing?' And they said to him, 'Be silent; put your hand over your mouth and come with us and be to us a father and a priest. Is it better for you to be a priest to the house of one man or to be priest to a tribe and a family in Israel?' And the priest’s heart was merry..." (Judges 18:18-20)
The Danites are not interested in a theological debate. Their response is blunt: "Shut up and come with us." They offer him a promotion. He can be a household priest for one man, or he can be the tribal priest for 600 men and their families. This is a career move. They are offering him more prestige, more influence, and likely more money. They appeal directly to his ambition and his greed.
And how does this man of God respond? "The priest's heart was merry." He was delighted. There is no wrestling with conscience, no loyalty to his employer Micah, no concern for the law of God. His heart was glad because he got a better offer. This man's god is his belly, his creed is his resume. He is the quintessential hireling Jesus warns about, the one who flees when the wolf comes because he does not care for the sheep. In this case, he doesn't flee; he joins the wolves because they have a better benefits package. He takes the ephod and the idols and goes right along with them. He is a spiritual prostitute, selling his services to the highest bidder.
This is a perpetual temptation for ministers of the gospel. The temptation is to measure success by the world's standards: bigger crowds, bigger budgets, more influence. But faithfulness is the only metric that matters to God. This Levite was unfaithful in a small thing, so it is no surprise that he leaps at the chance to be unfaithful in a larger one. His heart was merry, but God was not pleased.
The Cry of the Idolater (vv. 21-26)
The scene that follows is almost comical, if it were not so tragic and pathetic.
"And he said, 'You have taken away my gods which I made, and the priest, and have gone away, and what do I have besides?'" (Judges 18:24)
Micah gathers his neighbors and chases after the Danites. He confronts them, and his cry is one of the most pitiful statements in all of Scripture. "You have taken my gods which I made." Think about that sentence. The gods he worships are gods that he manufactured and that can be stolen. If your god can be carried off by 600 men, you have a very small god. If your god needs you to defend it, instead of the other way around, you are in a world of trouble.
Micah's cry reveals the utter bankruptcy of idolatry. "What do I have besides?" He has nothing. His entire sense of security and well-being was tied up in these metal objects and this hireling priest. When they are gone, he is desolate. This is the end point of all idolatry. Whatever you put in the place of God, whether it is money, or power, or reputation, or even a silver idol, will ultimately be taken from you, and you will be left with nothing.
The Danites' response is the logic of the bully. "Do not let your voice be heard among us, lest men, bitter of soul, fall upon you and you lose your life." In other words, "Be quiet or we will kill you." Might makes right. This is the law of the jungle, not the law of the covenant. Micah, seeing that they were too strong for him, does the only thing he can do. He turns around and goes home, a sadder and a wiser man, we might hope. He has learned a hard lesson about the kind of gods you can make with your own hands.
Conclusion: Your Made or Your Maker
This sordid little story is a microcosm of Israel's spiritual decay. It shows us a nation unmoored from the Word of God, driven by pragmatism, ambition, and brute force. Everyone in this story is doing what is right in his own eyes, and the result is theft, intimidation, and pathetic, soul-crushing idolatry.
The Danites wanted a god who would serve their purposes, a mascot for their military campaign. The Levite wanted a career that served his ambition. Micah wanted a god who would make him feel secure and prosperous. They all wanted a god they could control, a god who worked for them. And this is the essence of all idolatry. Idolatry is not just bowing to a statue. It is the attempt to domesticate the divine, to make God a means to our ends.
We are not so different. We may not have a silver idol on the mantelpiece, but our hearts are idol factories. We fashion gods out of our political ideologies, our career aspirations, our personal comforts, and our moralistic self-righteousness. We want a god who will bless our plans, affirm our choices, and stay out of the way when we want to sin. We want a god we can manage.
But the God of the Bible, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, is not a god who can be stolen. He is not a god who can be managed. He is the one who says, "I am the Lord, that is my name; my glory I give to no other, nor my praise to carved idols" (Isaiah 42:8). He is not a tribal mascot; He is the King of kings and Lord of lords. He is not a hireling priest; He is the Great High Priest, Jesus Christ, who offered Himself once for all.
Micah's pathetic question, "What do I have besides?" is a question every person must face. If they take away your job, your health, your reputation, your security, what do you have left? If your god is anything other than the Triune God of Scripture, your answer will be the same as Micah's: nothing. But if your trust is in the living God, the one who created you and redeemed you through the blood of His Son, then you can say with the apostle Paul, "For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord" (Romans 8:38-39).
That is a God who cannot be carried off in a getaway car. That is a God who holds you, not the other way around. The question for us is simple. Are we serving the gods we have made, or the God who made us?