Commentary - Judges 14:15-20

Bird's-eye view

In this passage, we see the unravelling of Samson's ill-conceived marriage, and it unravels in a way that is both pathetic and violent. The whole affair is a tangled mess of human sin, foolishness, and betrayal. The Philistines use thuggish threats, Samson's wife uses tears and manipulation, and Samson responds with a crude insult followed by Spirit-empowered slaughter. It is a grim picture of life "when every man did that which was right in his own eyes." Yet, through all this muck, the sovereign hand of God is at work. God is not the author of sin, but He is the author of the play. He is using the sinful choices of these characters to bring about His purposes, namely, to pick a fight with the Philistines and begin the deliverance of Israel. This passage is a stark reminder that God's plans are not thwarted by our folly, and He can use even the wrath of man to praise Him.

Outline

Context In Judges

This scene is the culmination of Samson's first major interaction with the Philistines, an interaction he initiated by wanting to marry one of their daughters. The entire book of Judges is a cycle of apostasy, oppression, crying out to God, and deliverance. Samson is one of those deliverers, a judge raised up by God. But he is a deeply flawed man, driven by his appetites. The text has already told us that this whole affair was "from the LORD," who was seeking an opportunity against the Philistines (Judg 14:4). This episode provides that opportunity. The personal betrayal and the subsequent violence escalate the conflict from a private dispute to a matter of open warfare, setting the stage for the rest of Samson's chaotic ministry.

Key Issues

Judges 14:15

Then it happened on the fourth day that they said to Samson’s wife, “Entice your husband, so that he will tell us the riddle, or we will burn you and your father’s house with fire. Have you invited us to impoverish us? Is this not so?”

The veneer of civility at this wedding feast is stripped away here. These Philistine companions are not good sports. They are thugs. Their response to being outsmarted is not to pay up, but to threaten murder by arson. This is how the world operates apart from grace. When their pride and their wallets are on the line, they resort to brute force. Notice their twisted logic. They accuse Samson's wife of inviting them in order to impoverish them. This is pure projection. They are the ones seeking to get out of a legitimate debt through extortion. Sin always seeks to blame-shift. They are gangsters, plain and simple, and they put the woman in an impossible position. This is the pagan world, full of fear and coercion.

Judges 14:16

So Samson’s wife wept before him and said, “You only hate me, and you do not love me; you have propounded a riddle to the sons of my people and have not told it to me.” And he said to her, “Behold, I have not told it to my father or mother; so should I tell you?”

Faced with masculine, violent coercion, Samson's wife now turns to feminine, emotional coercion. "You only hate me." This is the oldest trick in the book. It is emotional blackmail, designed to put the man on the defensive. She makes the issue about his love for her, when the real issue is her loyalty. Her allegiance is clearly with "the sons of my people," not with her husband. Samson's initial response is actually quite sensible. "Behold, I have not told it to my father or mother; so should I tell you?" He rightly understands that this is a secret that belongs within his own covenant family, and she has not yet proven herself to be a part of it. He is drawing a line, establishing a boundary. But it is a line drawn in the sand, and the tide is coming in.

Judges 14:17

However she wept before him seven days while their feast lasted. And on the seventh day he told her because she pressed him so hard. She then told the riddle to the sons of her people.

Samson's physical strength was legendary, but his moral and emotional resolve was tissue paper. For seven days, she wept. This was a sustained, relentless assault of tears and accusations. He was "pressed so hard." The Hebrew word here implies being constrained, harassed, and vexed. Nagging works. It wore him down. This is a picture of a man abdicating his headship under pressure. Like Adam in the garden, he listened to the voice of his wife when he should have listened to his own better judgment. And the moment he capitulates, the betrayal is immediate. "She then told the riddle to the sons of her people." There was no hesitation. Her loyalty was never with him. This entire marriage was a farce, built on lust and convenience, and it collapses at the first sign of trouble.

Judges 14:18

So the men of the city said to him on the seventh day before the sun went down, “What is sweeter than honey? And what is stronger than a lion?” And he said to them, “If you had not plowed with my heifer, You would not have found out my riddle.”

The Philistines come to him, smug and triumphant, reciting the answer as if they had figured it out themselves. But Samson is not a fool. He knows exactly what has happened. His response is not just an accusation; it is a crude and bitter insult that reveals the complete death of his marriage. "If you had not plowed with my heifer..." A heifer is a young cow. He is calling his wife a beast of burden and accusing them of using his property without his permission to get what they wanted. This is not a term of endearment. It is a public declaration of her betrayal and his contempt. The covenant of marriage is supposed to be a picture of Christ and the Church. What we see here is a picture of sin, betrayal, and ruin.

Judges 14:19

Then the Spirit of Yahweh came upon him mightily, and he went down to Ashkelon and struck down thirty of them and took their spoil and gave the changes of clothes to those who told the riddle. And his anger burned, and he went up to his father’s house.

Here we must pay close attention. In the middle of this sordid tale of human sin, "the Spirit of Yahweh came upon him mightily." God is not endorsing Samson's carnal anger or his foolish choices. But God is sovereignly hijacking the situation for His own purposes. Samson's anger is burning, but the Spirit channels that anger into a judicial act against the Philistines. He goes down to Ashkelon, a Philistine city, kills thirty men, and takes their clothes to pay off his wager. This is not simple revenge; it is an act of war. God is using Samson, flaws and all, as His instrument of judgment. But notice Samson's personal response. After this Spirit-empowered act, he doesn't stay to consolidate a victory. He sulks. His anger burns, and he abandons his wife and goes back to his father's house. The Spirit used him, but his character was not transformed. He is a blunt instrument in the hand of God.

Judges 14:20

But Samson’s wife was given to his companion who had been his friend.

The final verse is a pathetic epitaph for a pathetic marriage. The woman who betrayed him is casually given away by her father to the best man. Covenants mean nothing to these people. A wife is a piece of property to be disposed of for the sake of convenience and self-preservation. The father was likely terrified after the Philistines' threats and Samson's violent response, so he tries to smooth things over by giving his daughter to one of the locals. This act will, of course, only pour gasoline on the fire of Samson's rage, which is exactly what God intends. Every person in this story is acting out of selfish, sinful motives, and God is weaving it all together to accomplish His holy and righteous plan to judge the enemies of His people.

Application

First, this story is a stark warning about the folly of being unequally yoked. Samson's desire for a Philistine wife was the entry point for all this chaos. We are not to make covenants with the world, because the world does not play by God's rules. Betrayal is in its nature.

Second, we see the destructive nature of manipulation. The Philistines used threats of violence, and Samson's wife used tears and emotional blackmail. Both are forms of witchcraft, attempting to control others apart from God's ordained lines of authority. A godly man must be strong enough to resist both forms of pressure, and a godly woman must refuse to resort to such tactics.

Most importantly, we see the absolute sovereignty of God. God is not wringing His hands over Samson's foolishness. He is orchestrating it. He decrees the end from the beginning, and He uses the sinful actions of men and women to fulfill His purposes, without being Himself tainted by their sin. Samson was a flawed savior who won a victory through violence and rage. He points us to the true Savior, Jesus Christ, the perfect Bridegroom who was betrayed not by His bride, but for His bride. He did not kill thirty men to pay a debt; He laid down His own life to pay our debt of sin. And His righteous anger was poured out not on His enemies, but on the sin He bore on the cross, securing a true and lasting victory.