Commentary - Exodus 21:17

Bird's-eye view

Exodus 21:17 is a stark and bracing piece of case law that flows directly from the fifth commandment. Coming immediately after laws dealing with kidnapping and just two verses after the law against striking a parent, this statute establishes the high sanctity of the parental office. The law states that to curse a parent is a capital crime. This was not about a child having a temper tantrum or using rude language in a moment of frustration. The word for "curse" here implies a deep-seated contempt, a public and malicious repudiation of the parent's authority and personhood, effectively declaring them to be under God's judgment. In the covenant community of Israel, such an act was seen as a cancerous assault on the foundational structure of society itself. The family was the basic building block of the nation, and the authority of parents was a direct reflection of God's own authority. To curse a parent was therefore an act of high treason against the divine order, and the severe penalty reflected the gravity of the crime. It was a recognition that a society that tolerates such foundational rebellion is a society that is rotting from the inside out.

For the Christian today, this law, while not applied in its literal civil form, still carries immense weight. It reveals the heart of God concerning familial order and the sinfulness of rebellion. It points to the ultimate curse that we all deserve for our rebellion against our Heavenly Father. The gospel truth is that Christ became a curse for us, taking the death penalty that our treasonous hearts deserved. This law, therefore, forces us to confront the ugliness of our own sin and drives us to the cross, where the penalty was paid and from which we receive the grace to build families that honor God, starting with the basic, non-negotiable duty of honoring father and mother.

Outline

Context In Exodus

This verse is part of the "Book of the Covenant" (Exodus 20:22–23:33), which is the first major section of case law given to Israel after the Ten Commandments. The Ten Commandments provided the broad moral principles for the nation, and this section begins to apply those principles to specific situations in the life of the community. Exodus 21:17, along with verse 15 ("he who strikes his father or his mother shall surely be put to death"), is a direct application of the fifth commandment: "Honor your father and your mother" (Exodus 20:12). The placement is significant. These laws concerning the family are set alongside other capital crimes like murder (v. 12) and kidnapping (v. 16). This demonstrates that, in God's economy, an attack on the foundational structure of the family is as serious as an attack on an individual's life or liberty. It is a matter of public justice, not private family squabbles, because the health of the entire covenant nation depended on the stability and God-ordained order of the household.

Key Issues

The Weight of a Word

We live in a culture where words are treated as cheap things. People say what they want, when they want, with little regard for the consequences. Our public discourse is filled with vitriol, contempt, and, yes, cursing. But in the world of the Bible, words have weight. They create and they destroy. To speak a curse was not simply to vent frustration; it was to invoke evil, to call down judgment, to declare someone worthy of destruction. The Hebrew word here for curse, qalal, means to treat as light or trifling, to hold in contempt, to declare as worthless.

When this word is aimed at a father or mother, it is a profound act of rebellion. It is the creature declaring the creator (in a secondary, instrumental sense) to be of no account. It is a son or daughter treating with utter contempt the very source of their being, the ones to whom they owe their life, nurture, and instruction. This is not about a teenager muttering under his breath. This is a settled, defiant, and likely public act of repudiation. It is a verbal severing of the most basic bond of human society. God established the family as the first government, the first church, and the first school. The authority of parents is delegated authority from God Himself. Therefore, to curse a parent is to spit in the face of the God who appointed them. The penalty is severe because the crime is not just against the parent; it is against the entire created order that God has established.

Verse by Verse Commentary

17 “And he who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death.

The structure of the clause is direct and absolute. There are three parts to consider: the perpetrator, the crime, and the punishment.

First, the perpetrator: "he who curses." This is a general statement, applicable to any person within the covenant community. While we might immediately think of a rebellious youth, the law makes no age distinction. A grown man who publicly reviled and held his elderly parents in contempt would be just as liable. The issue is the act of rebellion against the God-given office, not the age of the offender.

Second, the crime: "curses his father or his mother." As noted, this is far more than disrespect. To curse is to declare someone or something to be contemptible, vile, and worthy of divine wrath. It is the opposite of blessing. To do this to one's own parents was to fundamentally reject one's own identity and place in the world. It was an act of social and spiritual anarchy. Notice that both father and mother are included and given equal protection. The authority of the family is a joint authority, and an attack on one is an attack on the institution itself.

Third, the punishment: "shall surely be put to death." The Hebrew phrasing here is emphatic, literally "dying he shall die." This is the language used for high crimes against God and His covenant. Why so severe? Because this sin was seen as a foundational corruption that, if left unchecked, would unravel the entire social fabric. A nation that does not honor its parents will not long honor its magistrates, and will ultimately not honor its God. The death penalty was a judicial recognition that the offender had, by his actions, excommunicated himself from the people of God. He had committed a form of spiritual suicide, and the civil penalty simply reflected that spiritual reality.

Of course, the application of this law required due process. The case of the stubborn and rebellious son in Deuteronomy 21 shows that parents could not carry out this sentence themselves. They had to bring their son before the elders of the city, and the case had to be proven. This was a public, judicial act, not a license for private vengeance. But the principle remains: rebellion in the home is a public menace.

Application

So what do we do with a law like this today? We are not theocratic Israel, and our civil magistrates do not wield the sword for this particular offense. The first thing we must do is recognize the abiding principle, what the Reformers called the general equity. The principle is that rebellion against parents is a heinous sin in the sight of God. Our culture treats it as a punchline, a normal rite of passage. God treats it as high treason.

Parents must teach their children that honoring them is not a suggestion; it is a commandment from God with a promise attached (Eph. 6:1-3). It is foundational to a life of blessing. Children must learn that their words have weight, and that speaking contemptuously to or about their parents is a grave offense against the Lord. The church must uphold this standard, calling out the sin of disrespect and filial rebellion for what it is.

But the ultimate application drives us to the gospel. Every one of us has, in our hearts, cursed our Heavenly Father. We have treated His authority as trifling. We have held His commands in contempt. We have lived as though He were of no account. In short, we are all guilty of this capital crime. The sentence pronounced in this verse, "shall surely be put to death," is the sentence that hangs over every one of us. But the good news of the gospel is that Jesus Christ, the only truly obedient Son, stepped in and took our place. On the cross, He was made a curse for us (Gal. 3:13). He endured the death penalty that our cosmic treason deserved. He took the judgment so that we could receive the blessing. Therefore, we do not honor our earthly parents in order to be saved. We honor our earthly parents because we have been saved by the Son who perfectly honored His Father, and who now gives us the grace to walk in His footsteps.